About
The purpose of this space...
This space shares what life is like for someone living with anxiety — not crippling anxiety, but the kind that brings regular waves of fear, worry, and physical symptoms that can quietly dull life’s shine.
Although there is a focus on scuba diving, the reality is, anxiety often permeates many aspects of life. So, I’ve decided to write about three broad areas that are familiar to me: scuba diving, travel, and daily life.
I created this space to share my experiences in the hope they offer comfort to someone going through something similar. For something to resonate, I believe there’s value in sharing the full picture — not just saying, “I have pre-dive anxiety” and jumping straight to solutions.
One blog that helped me was by Chloe from The Scuba Place. She described what was going through her mind before and during a dive, including a panic attack and the guilt that followed. What she shared helped me feel less alone, and I’m sharing my experience in the hope of doing the same for others. Her honesty also reminded me why it’s important to keep talking about this — to help normalise it.
I also want to encourage those thinking about stepping outside their comfort zone and into an adventure — whether that’s getting your diving certification, hiking to Everest Base Camp, or simply giving a presentation at work. The message here is: you can, despite anxiety. Despite the voice in your head urging you to retreat, or the physical symptoms putting up roadblocks along the way.
You don’t have to be an “anxious person” to relate — maybe you’re just feeling unsure about getting certified or a little nervous about getting back in the water. That’s okay too. You might find what I share helpful.
For those wanting to better understand and support someone with anxiety, I hope what I share offers a glimpse into the inner world — the one that can exist beneath a calm exterior.
Anxiety doesn’t just affect me — its ripple effect reaches those closest to me, like my husband. I hope this space not only offers insight but also reminds those walking alongside someone with anxiety that they’re not alone either.
Ultimately, I want this to be a place for honest reflections, a little lightness, and shared humanity.
In earnest,
Tori.
What You’ll Find Here
You’ll find reflections on my experiences with scuba diving, travel, and the everyday moments where anxiety has shown up. These are real and honest stories — with a mix of vulnerability and moments of humour, much like life itself.
I’ll also share lessons learned and practical tips from my own experience, as just one voice among many living with anxiety. It may not resonate with everyone, but if it helps even one person feel seen or less alone, then this will have been worth it.
Everyone’s experience with anxiety is different, and what I share here reflects my own.
This space isn’t a substitute for professional advice — if you’re unsure about what you’re experiencing, it’s always worth speaking with a doctor or qualified healthcare professional.
A Bit About Me
I’m not new to diving — I started my journey in 2021 and have completed over 100 dives so far. Yet, I still get pre-dive anxiety, with some days worse than others. The good news? I no longer feel nauseous before a dive…but I dream of the day I wake up feeling excited to dive, instead of being apprehensive and battling the usual physical symptoms. For now, I keep dreaming.
My husband and I love to travel — we’ve been to 64 countries and counting. Anxiety tags along, too, sometimes convincing me to stay within the comfort of the hotel room instead of exploring, or to skip activities I later regret. Thankfully, I have a partner who gently pulls me out of my comfort zone — like when we tackled the Everest Base Camp Trek, something that once felt unimaginable. Anxiety shapes our adventures, but we’ve found ways to work around it.
At home, we share our space with three rescue cats — two lovable scaredy-cats and one social but sassy troublemaker. They’re a huge part of our lives and, naturally, they made their way into this space.
100+ Dives
65 Countries
3 Cats
My Journey with Anxiety
Anxiety looks different for everyone. I know for many, anxiety can be completely overwhelming or even debilitating. Mine isn’t to that level, but it still affects how I experience the world. It shows up for me as overthinking, self-doubt, trouble speaking or thinking clearly in social settings, a racing heart before I talk at a work meeting, an upset stomach before an event, and the occasional sleepless night… just to name a few.
I’ve been living with it since my late teens, though I didn’t realise it at the time. Over the years, I’ve sought help and made progress. But talking about it? That’s taken longer. It was only recently that I felt comfortable enough to talk about it with my husband in a real way, and only now am I starting to let a few close friends in. Creating this space is another step in that direction.
One of the earliest moments I remember was in a shopping centre—I suddenly felt overwhelmed and just wanted to go home and crawl into a hole. That feeling has crept up from time to time since.
At university, I’d eat lunch in my car. The idea of sitting alone with a sandwich in the cafeteria or on the lawn was overwhelming. These days, I can proudly sit solo in the world’s largest shopping mall. Still, at work functions, my hands sometimes shake when I eat. I’ve mastered the art of hiding it—unless soup is involved (you’ll never see me eat soup at a work event, no matter how much I want to!).
I’ve been driving for almost two decades, but it still gets to me. Driving to familiar places is fine, but driving with others or to somewhere new triggers my anxiety. I’ve often taken a taxi just to avoid it. If I have to drive, I’ll run through every excuse in my head—only to end up doing it anyway. But once I’m driving, I’m fine. It’s the same with scuba diving—once I’m underwater, I love it. It’s just the lead-up that drains me.
Anxiety has shaped many parts of my life (and my partner’s). I’ll write about those moments in more detail on the blog. But I hope these snippets give you a clearer idea of what I mean when I say I’m an anxious person, or when I talk about pre-dive nerves.
Influences & Inspirations
The idea of writing a blog has been bubbling away for some time, nudged along by the words and examples of a few public figures.
David Goggins
Michelle Obama
Ed Mylett
I’ll share more about how each of these voices shaped my journey in a future blog post. For now, they’re part of the reason this space exists.
I hope this space becomes as meaningful to you as it has been to me—a place I can share my journey and creativity.
Supporting My Coffee (and Cat) Habit
This space is both a creative outlet and a passion project.
I share stories, ideas, and tips in the hope they’ll help or inspire someone out there.
If you’ve found something helpful here, that makes it all worthwhile. And if you’d like to support this space — with a kind word, a share, a coffee, or by exploring my designs — just know my cats and I are sending big, fluffy thanks your way.
