For most people, nothing. But if you’re a little socially anxious like me, it can feel nerve-wracking. More often than not, I avoid it altogether.
This photo is from a day when I had to be out of the house, I was hungry, and I pushed myself to have breakfast alone at a nearby mall. I’d already chosen a restaurant before leaving home, but when I got there and saw it was a little busy, I walked straight past. I told myself I was just “checking out other options”, but honestly, I just couldn’t bring myself to get a table.
After wandering around and realising every other restaurant was even busier, I knew I had to go back. Walking around hungry wasn’t an option, and by this stage, the level of avoidance I was practicing was getting a little silly. So I went back, took a deep breath, and grabbed a table — for one.
It wasn’t the table I’d hoped for either — no cozy corner was free. I ended up right by the foot traffic, with shoppers regularly passing by. I felt exposed, like I was on display (even though I knew no one actually cared). It felt like all eyes were on me, even though I was probably just another blur in the background.
Back when I was in university, eating by myself was even more terrifying. I’d buy a sandwich (the easiest thing to grab with the least amount of human interaction) and then head straight to my car to eat. On my way, I’d pass the beautifully manicured lawn where I longed to sit and have my sandwich, but I could never bring myself to do it. No spot felt safe, and so I would walk right on and find comfort in my car.
I’ve come a long way since then — but that part of me hasn’t completely disappeared, just better managed, like taming a nervous beast.
Even now, in social settings, my hands sometimes shake a little as I eat. This time, they didn’t — but I could feel the tremor waiting, ready to surface if I’d let it.
It took some mental energy to wrangle the nerves, but I did it. I sat through the discomfort, and I left the café feeling proud.
Sometimes it’s the simplest things in life that feel the scariest. When you conquer them, those are the moments worth celebrating. And this photo from the café is my celebratory photo.
Have you ever kept walking because you let your nerves lead the way?
Dining Alone – Through Anxious Eyes
What’s so scary about eating by yourself at a café?
Stories, reflections, and little discoveries from a diver, traveller, and occasional overthinker — shared in the hope they offer comfort or inspiration.
Supporting My Coffee (and Cat) Habit
This space is both a creative outlet and a passion project.
I share stories, ideas, and tips in the hope they’ll help or inspire someone out there.
If you’ve found something helpful here, that makes it all worthwhile. And if you’d like to support this space — with a kind word, a share, a coffee, or by exploring my designs — just know my cats and I are sending big, fluffy thanks your way.
